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Freedom to explore

Freedom to explore

Posted on by Silvia
freedom to explore

When i was growing up there was a lot of judgment on sex, and especially a girl liking a lot of sex. I was that girl and i didn’t think there was anything wrong with exploring sex.

There was shame & limiting beliefs on what is considered ‘right’ sexual behavior (ok there still is…)
We keep everything in our shadow and hide our sexual preferences where it can die and shrink into nothing or where it turns into a demon one day or another.

As a very young girl I played with myself and I played doctor with my neighbour girls.

From when I was 13 I played with many boys and boyfriends.

With my first boyfriend, we lived in bed being intimate as much as possible.

Until i was 37 I had several boyfriends, i tried free relationships, swinging, being faithful, made love, had sex, broke up, stayed too long.

Then for almost 8 years I was without a partner, started practicing tantra and real meditation, exploring with some practice partners, short relationships but also being in solitude for long periods of time, periods of not feeling sexual and periods of exploring with myself, and exploring energy, breath, meditation, healing.
Since I discovered shibari bondage 7 years ago I have looked around in the world of BDSM and a combination of tantra and kink – conscious kink.

My sexual energy is still very high in my life, I love going in ecstasy, my body is buzzing a lot and i love it, feeling so alive, and also I love being in meditation or physical exercise. But most of all what i love at this moment is the openness of my heart and my vulnerability. It comes with a lot of courage and fears.

Still I am not done exploring, it’s my study for life.

Our freedom in sexuality and especially our capacity to love (however scary it is) is our freedom to be or become who we are.

All preferences, all sexes, any gender a.n.y.t.h.i.n.g goes

Everything is ok in mutual consent.

It’s about what makes our hearts jump & about making loving connections.

It is about taking our own responsibility, if we don’t force or disrespect, ourself and others, everything is allowed

So much freedom to explore!

Touch yourself

Touch yourself

Posted on by Silvia

Exploring ourselves intimately is such a deep, liberating, fun and challenging path to follow.
Showing our vulnerability, our greatness and our true hearts is something we learn by taking it step by step.

We all have our own little buttons, fantasies and preferences.
Partly this is who we are and partly it is influenced by the relationships we had when growing up. 
Besides taboos or conditioning around intimacy it is the things we missed, simple touch or cuddles, maybe emotional availability of parents that can influence the way we treat ourselves and also what we are looking for in an other being.

If we discover new ways of connecting to ourselves and others – maybe learning to touch differently, try out some fantasies, being held or holding somebody – we are giving our self the chance to change our perception of intimacy and also bring new life energy in our bodies.

Togetherness and mirroring brings beautiful gifts. And at the same time showing up for ourselves and learning to be fully and unconditionally present in our own bodies gives us the self love we need to be able to show ourself fully to others.